Woman finds severed thumb in salad

Once, when I was flying on Midwest Express, I found a live bug in my salad. The flight attendants were so horrified that they said I could have whatever I wanted. My friend Chris Musto, with whom I was travelling, loved the freshly baked chocolate chip cookies Midwest provides on its flights, so I asked if they could bring him an extra cookie. They brought him an extra two dozen cookies, which he wolfed down in less than three minutes.

I wonder what they would have done for me if I found a thumb?

Many thanks to Lang Whittaker at Slam Online for pointing out the link!