In the grand satirical tradition of The Darth Side comes The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs.

This is one of the funniest things ever. I’m surprised Steve hasn’t had his army of lawyers take it down yet. Get it while you can!

Speaking of John Doerr

Do you realize he’s now got a company called “My Asshole”???? Seriously. Check it out here. And like, okay, I see the accent mark, but whatever, I just hope it’s not a category name next time Sean Connery is on Celebrity Jeopardy. And come on. Do you mean to tell me of all the possible names in the world, they couldn’t come up with something that every teenage boy in the world wouldn’t immediately make into a joke? Like did nobody on the team kinda look at the name and go, like, Uh, hey, dudes, we might have like a problem here or something. My theory is that they hired a consultant to develop the name and actually paid a boatload of money for it, and that the consultant was somebody who got burned by KP on some other deal, like cheated out of some shares on the Google IPO or something, and this was their way of getting revenge. Anyhoo, on the way out of the Clinton meeting I’m walking out with T.J. Rodgers, who by the way is a total right-wing dick but also a totally great dude, and I couldn’t resist, since Doerr was standing there all shattered cause he really really wants to be Secretary of State or something. So I go, Hey, John, how’s that company MyAsshole working out? He shakes his head and goes, Steve, it’s pronounced mee-ah-soh-lay. And I go, Seriously? Man cause it looks just like MyAsshole. I thought maybe it was a spin-off from MySpace or something. And T.J. goes, Yeah, is Ben still the CEO there? Ben Dover? Or is that pronounced Ben Do-VAIR? Doerr just smiles his tight little weasel smile and goes, Thanks for coming, guys. And when I got to the JobsMobile, no lie, somebody had keyed my door. Dick.

Many thanks to Vinnie for turning me on to this!