The Melancholy of the Happy

I am probably one of the happiest people in the world, but even I feel melancholy every once in a while.  While I’m lucky enough that these feelings are both rare and invariably transitory, I’m struck by the fact that I feel like I shouldn’t write about them. It’s not because I’m afraid that revealing … Continue reading The Melancholy of the Happy

Ambition vs. Meaningful Goals

Leo Widrich at Buffer recently wrote about how he has been reflecting on the dangers of ambition: “[Ambition] gets in the way of doing the great work of our lives, of living out what we’re already naturally gravitating towards. It also blinds my awareness especially of accepting things how they truly are—instead of making them … Continue reading Ambition vs. Meaningful Goals

The Dangerous Conflation of Money and Self-Worth

One of the big dangers that entrepreneurs (and everyone else) face in Silicon Valley is the temptation to conflate money and self-worth.  I was reminded of this by an entrepreneur that I’m coaching, who has been dealing with the whipsaw effect of fluctuating net worth and income. Making money and/or getting a big payday through … Continue reading The Dangerous Conflation of Money and Self-Worth

What Entrepreneurs and Leaders Can Learn From Happy Marriages

As a happily married man, I can confirm what the latest research indicates: The secret to a happy marriage is kindness and generosity. When I was a kid, I was mystified by altruism; I couldn’t understand why my parents would always let me have the best share.  At the time, I just figured that they … Continue reading What Entrepreneurs and Leaders Can Learn From Happy Marriages

You Can’t Avoid Putting In The Time

I have a lot of admiration for people who are willing to say unpopular things.  Experience has taught me that popularity is only weakly correlated with correctness, and that a willingness to say unpopular things may often be the only way to say true things. Penelope Trunk is one of several friends who have made … Continue reading You Can’t Avoid Putting In The Time

You Don’t Have To Choose Between Meaning And Happiness

My good friend and fellow writer Ben Casnocha asked the question recently, “Do You Want a Happy Career or a Meaningful One?” http://linkd.in/1kPS9RQ To Ben, there is a fundamental conflict between the two: “The things that make you happy (low stress, good health, sex) are not the same things that make your life seem meaningful … Continue reading You Don’t Have To Choose Between Meaning And Happiness

Motivate yourself from within, not with comparisons

John Lilly at Greylock recently wrote an excellent post about how entrepreneurs often fall victim to survivorship bias.  Because we tend to hear about positive outliers, we end up feeling inadequate: http://bit.ly/1bxzwcH “The companies and people we all compare ourselves to are the ones who won, and who are winning. The Googles of the world. … Continue reading Motivate yourself from within, not with comparisons

Don’t Stay Hungry

Entrepreneurs are frequently admonished to “stay hungry.”  These words are almost like scripture, having been cited by Steve Jobs himself in his legendary 2005 Stanford commencement speech. Intuitively, these words seem to be true across a host of domains.  Starving artists of all types feel the curse of the sophomore slump; going from hungry unknown … Continue reading Don’t Stay Hungry

Always Be Crafting

When you’re a writer, one of the effects on your life is that you’re always processing the events around you on two levels: Your gut reactions, and your writer’s eye for the bigger story. For some writers, this metacognition brings misery.  Think of all the tortured artists throughout history, whose sensitivity made the experience of … Continue reading Always Be Crafting

Happiness Doesn’t Depend on Events

The research finding of the day comes courtesy of Eric Barker and Bakadesuyo: “Ed Diener and Martin Seligman screened over 200 undergraduates for levels of happiness, and compared the upper 10% (the “extremely happy”) with the middle and bottom 10%. Extremely happy students experienced no greater number of objectively positive life events, like doing well on … Continue reading Happiness Doesn’t Depend on Events